Praise God!!!!

Dear Lydia,

After two surgeries, a collapsed lung and being in the ICU for a total of 12 days, we are finally moving on. Another floor, new faces, closer to getting home. Home. Such a very sweet word after all we have been through. 

Every single day we have been here I find more people to pray for....from the mom down the hall with the 16 year old son who is dealing with some very heavy stuff, to the baby across the hall who is the same age as you and has only spent 20 days of his entire life at home, to the tiny girl next door who is here waiting on a heart transplant. All of these stories weigh heavily on my heart. 

It's amazing to me that every time God hears the whispers of self pity in my heart, He places someone directly in my path who reminds me that this all could be so much worse. 

I could be watching you lay in a bed, not knowing if you would ever open your eyes and look at me, let alone smile, laugh and talk. I could be coming day in and day out, hoping for my baby to get better so that I could take her home where she belongs, finally. I could be watching you fade before my very eyes, knowing that your very life depends on someone else's misfortune, and praying that a heart comes in time. What gives me the right to feel sorry for myself? I am truly blessed, and lucky. But for a twist of fate, those other parents could be us.

The neighbor baby's mama prayed with me the other day while they were starting an IV on you. I was standing in the hallway, with tears streaming down my face, because I couldn't stand to see you hurt any more. She told me that every pinprick, every hurt, every tear served a greater purpose than we could even imagine. Each of these will be worth something in the end. Yes. They will make you stronger, Lydia, and they are all intended to heal your formerly broken heart, now whole and healthy. 

Praise God for His patience with me when I forget things that I knew without a doubt yesterday. Praise Him for His constant reminders that WE are the lucky ones. We are the ones others should envy. Praise Him for healing you.

I have an obligation to share our story and the lessons I have learned (and am still learning!). For you. For others. For myself. For the glory of God.

I love you so much, Bug, and I am so proud of you! You never cease to amaze me in some way every single day.......

xoxoxoxo,

Mommy