“If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. I'll always be with you.”
~A.A. Milne, from "Winnie the Pooh"

Thursday, March 28, 2013

A Break From the Norm

This post won't be about Liddy. It won't really be about Down syndrome. It'll be a break from what this blog usually focuses on....simply because I feel strongly the need to put my two cents into an ongoing debate that is the focus of a whole lot of attention this week...and will continue to be in the coming weeks, and even possibly months. Gay marriage. I'm sure that I don't have a lot to say that hasn't been said already (and more than likely somewhere with much wider readership than my own humble blog) but I DO feel that it still needs to be said.
I am a heterosexual woman. I consider myself to be a Christian, despite the fact that I don't currently attend church. I was raised in the church and while I may not know everything about the Bible, I do know enough to get by and to try to live according to God's will. Not that I always live a Godly life. I sin. I make mistakes. I am forced to ask for God's forgiveness on a regular basis.
With all that being said, I wholeheartedly support gay marriage. It's probably not a subject that I had ever given much thought to before Liddy was born and if I had had a leaning one way or the other, I probably wouldn't have voiced it publicly. Before Liddy, I was sort of a coward, I'm ashamed to admit. A rock the boat sort of girl I have never been. However, the person I was before Liddy has been changed and the new person I have become simply can not and will not remain silent when I am faced with what I believe to be injustice and inequality.
Who am I to say that someone should not enjoy the rights I myself enjoy or the rights that I fight so hard for for my daughter because they were born with a different sexual preference than I myself was? How can I not openly embrace the couples I know who are loving and deeply committed to each other, who accept others for who they are without question? And how can I, as a self proclaimed Christian, declare them as sinners unworthy of compassion, acceptance and love?
So while I see the divide grow, even within our Down syndrome community, I can't help but ask myself..."How does this happen?" How does the same group of individuals who fight so hard for their own children's inclusion, acceptance, and basic human rights turn their backs on another group of people who are only asking for the same thing? Because, in essence, that is PRECISELY what is happening when someone declares their aversion to everyone being treated equally.
"The Bible says that homosexuality is an abomination." I hear you. The Bible also says that anyone who eats the fat of an animal should be cut off from their people, any one who blasphemes the name of the Lord should be put to death, we shouldn't eat beef, or cut our hair, or wear clothing woven of different fabrics. More importantly, it says that we should love our neighbors as ourselves, leave the judgement to God and forgive the sins of others, just as they forgive us of our own. So where do we get off proclaiming to be Christian, yet acting so very un-Christ-like? I'm pretty sure that Jesus would be highly disappointed in some of His people right now.
"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Hmmm. So who here is capable of casting that first stone? I know for sure it's not me. And I am pretty positive it's probably not you either.
So can we all just agree to disagree, if that is the case, and let others live their lives as they so choose? Can we let them marry who they wish, whether we condone it or not? Because in my opinion, we're all just people searching for happiness and personal fulfillment. Most of us want a better world for our kids to grow up in. A whole lot of us fight tooth and nail for our kids to have the same rights that "typical" people do.And I would bet solid money that if someone tried to make a law that said kids with Ds could never get married, all Hell would break loose. I know I'd be right there fighting for all I was worth. Which is why I'm throwing my hat into THIS fight as well. These people who want nothing more than to get married are someone's children, someone's sisters and someone's brothers. Someday it might be YOUR child. And don't we all deep down just want our kids to be happy?


Spread love, not hate. Because the world could really use a whole lot more of one and a whole lot less of the other.......

10 comments:

  1. Amen, Heidi. Very well said. Thanks for taking a stand. Jesus did not teach hate and Intolerance.

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    1. Love to you both and Bobby too :)

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    2. For sure. And the Bible was never intended to be used as a weapon. It makes me incredibly sad.

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    3. No it was not....and it strikes me as infinitely sad that people would find the need to pervert and twist its words to suit their personal agendas as well. Take it as a whole. Don't use a book as justification for hurting others and denying them their Constitutional rights.

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  2. Thank you for adding your voice to support the rights of everyone to live and love without discrimination.

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    1. Thank you for reading and supporting me! :)

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  3. Amen! I am so proud of you. My 15 year old step-daughter just recently "came out of the closet". I had been wondering for a while because it seemed like she always had one female friend that was closer than the others. One weekend we had her a few months ago and I pulled her aside and straight out asked her. She apologized for being a lesbian. I told her not to apologize for who she is. I dont love her any less.

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    1. Chrissy, that made me tear up. Seriously. For one, that she felt that she had to apologize for who she is. And for two, that this is a world where our kids grow up afraid to be who they are. Its so sad to me. People often wonder how they would react if their child was gay.....and I can say without qualms that I love and support ALL of my children unconditionally, no matter who they grow up to be. :)

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    2. I agree. I asked her if she was ashamed, her answer was no, but she was afraid of us not wanting anything else to do with her. After a nice long talk, she seemed more confident and okay. She now openly writes posts to her girlfriend on facebook, and no one in the family disowns her. :). I told them they could stuff it if they have a problem with it. lol. We figured with having 4, there was a 25% chance of one being bi, and a 25% chance one would be gay. We were correct on one, and pretty sure we are on the other one too. I stand behind all my kids 100%. Their sexual preference doesnt make them all that they are, or define them, its just a part of them, and I will NOT judge any of them.

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  4. Unfortunately a lot of people who preach the bible in the disagreement of marriage equality only see what they want to see or what applies to their side of the "argument".

    And when someone quotes the bible, I'm usually quick to point out that the legal definition of a marriage is a legal relationship or domestic partnership. It doesn't say a legal relationship between a man & a woman. It doesn't say you the people have decided to separate church & state except in the case of marriage. And anyone who uses the bible to hurt a person or group of people has a lot to repent for.

    I also always point out that there are more failed man/woman marriages than there are gay/lesbian marriages/relationships. So we might have a lot to learn.

    In my opinion, it is what it is. They love each other. They want to partner together and commit to one another in the same manner that my husband & I did. God bless. They may want to raise children together or perhaps they just want to know that in the morning their partner in crime is legally obligated to be there.

    Good for you for putting it out there.

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